When is it love?
As life goes on, people meet and fall in love. The inertia of day to day problems tarnish the dream of everlasting love and many find themselves alone, disappointed and wary. Clients call me, full of angst about the man or woman whose hearts they put in their hands, and ask me, "Can I trust that this love will last?" In order to find true love, one has to know the difference between love and need.
Here are 4 essential truths about love relationships that I want to share:
1 - Love is not attachment.
2 - Giving one's power away to a person is not love.
3 - Love is not a feeling.
4 - Love is not a thing.
To me "true love" is actually the art of being loving.
Love is a choice you make to give to your loved one on a daily basis. In giving you spend your life force, your time and energy onto making the other person happy, safe and content. Love spans time and space, and is not dependent upon your physical circumstances. It is the wisdom of the heart.
Timing is all important in love.
In order to stop being a consumer, a mere recipient of someone's love, and thus being dependent and needy, one must focus on being loving. Being loving gives one self-independence and is not conditional to what people give you. It allows you to not be affected by the disappointments that are inevitable in every human relationship, because it is rooted in your soul's integrity.
This attitude towards love can help you transform your understanding of yourself and your lover and thus reveal the true beauty of what being loving can bring.
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