Before diving into the topic of Karmic marriages, allow me to quickly define them. Simply put, karmic marriages are a repeating cycle of toxic behaviors that never progress to a higher understanding. It’s stagnation and put another way, it’s that feeling of being trapped on a hamster wheel that will never end!
Many speak of karmic marriages as relationships that have a push/pull dynamic and that they do not last. Quite often, karmic marriages can last 30+ years. These are not Liz Taylor and Richard Burton-type unions which are more like twin flames unions filled with fire and emotions being turned inside out, but rather relationships where both parties essentially fall asleep and move through life on automatic pilot. The sad part is that often only one of the partners wakes up from their “sleepwalking marriage” that they say was static or spun into loops of toxic patterns.
In working with clients, I have found that these types of relationships not only last but are so co-dependent that once the marriage morphs into a celibate marriage, the union is held by a string of financial ties. Some partners live under the same roof, sleeping in separate rooms while some go as far as to live in other towns. It’s amazing how common these celibate marriages are.
So what happens when one of the partners wakes up? Well, all hell breaks loose and a Tsunami of emotions erupts like a volcano coming back alive from decades of suppressed needs.
How Can You Determine if You are in a Karmic Marriage?
Do you feel that your life is thriving?
Do you feel as though your relationship continuously grows and changes?
Do you feel any passion for your partner, yourself, or your life together?
Do you have a vision greater than yourself about the future?
Making the Decision to Leave Your Marriage
Karmic relationships are not a punishment from past lives. Karmic relationships are there to push you to start asking the right questions. It’s there to trigger you. Some couples will live and die in such marriages. And that’s OK, for that is their life path. However, if you have been awakened, discover what has risen within yourself. You might feel confused, afraid, and sad. Allow those emotions to rise with the clarity that is sure to settle you as you work through whether to stay or leave a relationship.
You might want to run from your relationship. But it might be better to sit as the evolution of this new understanding about yourself and your partner emerges. You might want to talk to your partner about gathering your forces to launch a campaign to heal, to ignite your relationship with the fire of new passions, interests, challenges, and adventures.
If your partner refuses. Then begin the journey as mentioned above on your own.
If your partner is meant to be your forever after, they will watch your evolution and they will either want to join your healing path or they will be fear-filled over it and, in some cases, even angered or saddened by your evolution.
Do not feel guilty. Send them healing light and love but keep going. Keep moving. Keep seeking the light that you have carried all your life but never saw you had until now. Sometimes, we cannot continue with a partner we still love, and care for. However, we can honor them as the conduit to our greatest life lessons.
If leaving is the only choice...
Do it with compassion for yourself and for your partner. Do it with passion. Do it because it feels right. But just do it!