It has become a wide spread epidemic among the stars too. Brad Pitt/Jennifer Aniston, Maria Shriver/The Terminator, Sandra Bullock/Jesse James (still don't get that one). Cheating causes a range of emotions, we have our highs and lows and most times hurtful consequences. Despite all of that, cheating has been around since the beginning of time.
Infidelity is also a big movie genre. There are some great ones including 1987's “Fatal Attraction,” Demi Moore's “Indecent Proposal” from ‘93, Spike Lee's controversial “Jungle Fever” in ‘91 and how about Diane Lane’s incredible performance in 2002's “Unfaithful?” Let’s not forget the music industry with “Before He Cheats” by Carrie Underwood, “Unfaithful” by Rihanna, “Jolene” by the amazing Dolly Parton, and one of my favorites, “Cry Me a River,” Justin Timberlake’s famous tribute to cheating Brittany Spears, just to name a few!
Please note, this list isn't for everybody and it is impossible to cover everything. I will not be addressing soulmates who find each other while married to others since that is a topic all in itself. Infidelity can be painful for all parties involved and it is not my intention to hurt anyone. When it comes to cheating, this is what I have seen over the years and I hope it helps.
#1 - For the Cheated On... INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY!
#2 - THE 5 W's including WTF?!
Who? WTF? Where? When? and Why?
Once you confront your cheater with proof, ask your questions but don't expect the truth at first (and unfortunately depending on your partner, possibly not at all.) During readings, I explore both your partner’s thoughts and emotions to see whether they are telling you the truth or just giving you what you want to hear. I’ve found the Why part is always the hardest since it doesn’t always make sense and there isn't always a reason. One can still love someone and hurt them; love doesn't always guarantee fidelity. These readings can be difficult and painful but helpful and empowering during your decision-making process.
#3 – Mark Your Territory!
On a serious note, I have found it helps to mark your territory and confront the 3rd party. Often, the cheater is lying to both of you. Calling the other person and talking about what is really happening helps. I can hear you saying "Sadia, I don't want to talk to that @#$%*&!" It’s painful and definitely not for everyone but when you feel like you've lost your power this helps you regain control. Sometimes that @#$%*& is being told lies about you and thinks you are the @#$%*&. It does help if you both know the truth about each other. Plus, it’s harder to cheat if you can't get away with it!
#4 – Should I Stay or Should I Go?
Can we handle the clean-up alone? Should we call friends, family or psychic advisors for support? Should we stay and rebuild or should we walk away and start new elsewhere? Sometimes we realize it is time to go and sometimes the rebuilding is worth the time and effort. As you begin to heal and see the reality of your circumstances you will know what to do and as always, I am here for you!
#5 – For the “Other Woman/Man”
• Is he telling you the truth?
Thought readings can help here too it helps to know what you have gotten yourself into so you can make decisions for yourself. By the way, a thought reading is a type of reading I do where I look into your partners thoughts and depending on the strength of my connection, I can often sound just like them by repeating things they've actually said, it's pretty cool. Anyway, most times "the earthquake" is so caught up in his own feelings and only focused on one thing and one thing only... himself!
There can be love here but as I've said earlier love doesn't mean you won't get hurt. There are times when I look into a guy’s thoughts and he is telling the truth and sometimes he's not. There are times when he’s sincere and will follow thru and sometimes he won't. It helps to be prepared and to know if you can trust what he is saying. If you a re calling for a thought reading, it is important that you take note of the date and time a statement is made that you need clarification on and have it handy when you call.
#6 – For the Earthquake (aka the Cheater)
Maybe you are unhappy, lonely, and tired of responsibilities. Or maybe you feel alive again. Or maybe you are in love or bored or having a midlife crisis. Or maybe you just don't care… Whatever the reason is, there is always a moment during that courting stage to stop for a second and think about all parties involved. If you take a moment to sincerely think about the consequences before you act... would you still do it?
If you made it all the way down to the end of this article, thank you, I know I had a lot to say! But wait, before I go, I want to I leave you with a final quote from Grammy Award winning singer/songwriter Alicia Keys "Through the shake of an earthquake I will never fall. That’s how strong my love is."
I hope during this painful time your love for yourself is always strong, you know that you are a survivor and will get thru it and for all of you affected by the earthquake, you know that I am here for you always.