We live fast. Communication these days for most of us is a mix of chat apps, smart phone videos, twitter feeds and visiting various web sites. The line between business demands, personal communications and entertainment is blurring. Our lives are part of a non-stop stream of information. The rhythm of the times is such that it is no wonder we hope relationships can keep. Adapting to technology is easy. Imperceptibly we are adapting to the work flow. The one area that is being pressured to move even faster is love.
Just a Passing Glance?
Romantic ideals dictate that a passing glance is all it takes to find your heart’s desire. Brief introductions and a bit of small talk can confirm that a romance has begun. The idea that real love is a quick yes or no proposition sounds nice on paper. Reality has another tale to tell.
Rushed as everyone is, some put more consideration buying the newest smart phone than picking a partner. People easily spend hours and days pouring over websites before picking something as basic as a new microwave. Picking a TV/streaming service is given more consideration that picking a new lover. I think you get the point.
It is a nice idea to think that meeting someone and instantly falling in love is how it should go. The disadvantage to this method is that some do not make good first impressions. Nerves, excitement or stress can make even a wonderful person look bad. Should you meet your soul mate after a bad day at work, their normal charm, grace and nice demeanor could be missing in action.
Yes, First Impressions CAN Be Wrong
How many times have you met a person that left a weak first impression only to discover that you found a lot to like after a bit of time had passed? Some people do not present well the first time around. A person who comes off as aloof, bored and indifferent could be shy. A person who talks loudly and is opinionated could be the most loyal friend you ever had.
Appearances are subjective. Everyone has preferences. However, what would happen if you discovered that the girl with tattoos and body piercing has an advanced degree from Harvard in engineering. Or, take the rough looking biker who just happens to be the owner of the most successful software company in history. The point is that you cannot look at people and figure them out in a few moments, or as the old saying goes, “Don’t judge a book by its cover.”
There is also the flip. You may meet the most attractive woman in the world. She has charm grace and style. You get home only to learn she has anger management issues and a drug problem. The dapper man with movie star looks and abs of steel looks like the ideal companion. You take him home and he instantly demands $600 and a place to crash for a month for free.
Pushing love faster than light speed has huge disadvantage. Taking your time has every advantage in the world.