When it comes to love, it is easy to give someone the benefit of the doubt. After all, with something this strong, he has to feel it too, right? Right?! The problem is that some people not only don’t deserve it, but they will take advantage of your kindness. Luckily, like in poker, everyone has a tell. There are some red flags that are unmistakable signs that he isn’t who you think he is.
He Doesn’t Like Being Discussed
It is perfectly naturally to talk to your friends about your boyfriend, fiancé, spouse, or partner – and anyone worth being with will understand that. He will also understand that you may want to discuss him with an online psychic or get a love tarot reading. Good guys don’t mind. If your man has an issue with being discussed, he’s probably not who you think he is.
He Isn’t Responsive
While it is unnatural to expect an immediate text back, you should expect a reply. If your guy isn’t replying to your texts or messages and you know his phone is practically attached to his hand, there is a good chance that he is not reciprocating with you in other ways – namely in how he feels about you. Taking a long time to respond or not responding at all can also mean that there is someone (or "someones") taking his time. Either way, it is a good sign it is time to walk away.
He Doesn’t Consider Your Needs
If your man only makes dates with you at the last minute, forgets to call you, or absolutely refuses to go to events with you, he’s probably not who you think he is. That type of behavior means that you are really low on his priority list, and you are so much better than that. Good guys go with you to company events, start a real conversation with you at least a couple of times a week, and have no problem making plans with you a week or more in advance.
He Thinks Everyone Else Has the Problem
When you meet a man who says that all his ex-girlfriends are crazy or that all his bosses have had it out for him, run (don’t walk) in the opposite direction. In both cases, the common denominator is HIM. The better question is what did he do to make these women behave “crazily” or his bosses to “have it out for him.”
Some people are chronic liars, and many have something to hide. It could be something small, like a dysfunctional family, but it could also be something that could hurt you in the end. If you catch your man in a lie, no matter how small, it is time to have a serious conversation.
Watch out for these red flags that your boyfriend, fiancé, spouse, or partner isn’t who you think he is. These tell-tale signs can help you spot a phony from a mile away and avoid the heartache that is inevitable with a man who doesn’t treat you the way you deserve.