Remind you of any couples you know?
First of all, George and Dot were not fighting or arguing in any way, shape or form. Dot is not the mayor of Crazyville and George does not have her on his ignore list. However, like many couples, they are just simply living and experiencing the classic communication divide between men and women.
Way back when, men would leave the cave to hunt for food. They’d stand in the woods or a field focused with only one goal in mind – dinner! At the same time, they’d hunt in silence since they didn’t want to scare off any potential meal. They were also silent because they didn’t want to end up being some saber tooth tiger’s meal.
Now, back at the caves the women folk took care of the kids, gathered fruits, nuts and berries. They were also more social and communicated with each other. I’m sure a conversation went like this: “I hope Trog gets more caribou this time, we have two more mouths to feed. Oh, and be careful when you go looking for berries. You don’t want the berries from that bush over there. No. They’re poisonous. Instead, take the path and you’ll find a bush near the edge of the water, and… etc. etc. etc.”
So there you have a bunch of cave men standing around being silent focused on one thing, while the women folk take care of the kids, talk and communicate with each another, in addition to gathering the fruits, nut, and berries.
Today, guys generally do the same thing. They stand around, they’re quiet and usually focus on one thing. Their camaraderie centers on large groups of buddies focused on activities rather than conversation. At the same time, women today are the multi-tasking soccer moms focused on friendships and making connections. Sharing secrets, relating experiences, revealing problems and discussing options are all a part of their daily routines.
So, the bottom line: Women communicate through dialogue; discussing emotions, choices and problems. Guys are action-oriented and communicate to achieve goals. Sure, there are guys who want to yak about their feelings and women who quickly tire of conversation. Still, one simple way to easily classify the communication divide is to remember: talk versus deed (note: if Dot had known this, she might not have ruined her Sunday in the park with George).
Curious about what your guy’s thinking? Ask a man—give me a call and let’s find out!