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Recovering from addiction takes patience and understanding.
One of the major illusions that an addict has is that they are a Party Boy/Girl or they “Love to Party”. A party is a social gathering or get-together for merriment or to host a special occasion and in an addict’s life this is a misconception. The harsh truth is that addicts invite others or they invite us to “Party”, because we all abuse the same “Drug” of choice. We exchange roles as both enablers and codependents with our “Guests” to feed our addiction and will not extend or accept an invitation with anyone that does not have the same selfish motive. It is only after this false belief is shattered and we commit ourselves to recovery that the celebration can begin.
During the healing process, we become aware that our whole life up till now has been spent in dueling roles as attacker vs. victim, abuser vs. abused, light vs. dark, and manic vs. depressive and now desperately strive for balance. We are fearful of surrendering, because we are control freaks, yet angry that ironically our lives are out of control. We become enraged, cast blame and then feel shame and eventually succumb and get down on our hands and knees humbly praying for help finding our life purpose.
Doors open and Teachers and Mentors come forward to help us to transfer fear into love and urge us to love what we do and do what we love, leaving money out of the equation. We not only are able let go of People, Places, and Things that do not serve a purpose, but find peace that we said our goodbyes.
The Ghosts of the Past
We are celebrating our new lifestyle and have embraced our dark side and nurture it with love. We surround ourselves with positive people who accept us for who we are and where we are at. We may be offended by those we come into contact with that have unhealthy habits, but instead of dismissing them we treat them with kindness and feel blessed, since they are “Ghosts of Bleak Days Past.”
We meet our infinity partner at a gathering and both of us are on the sidelines watching the others, talking, eating, and dancing as if nobody’s watching and we turn to each other both laughing and say almost simultaneously “I want what they are taking. And I want some more. And I want some more”, and love that we can both enjoy recovery humor. We grab each other’s hands and join the festivities, which are never ending in our mind, body, and spirit.
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