Quite often we stay in relationships that stopped honoring us long ago (maybe never). Fear of not being able to find another beloved keeps us tied down to what is the very relationship that Is destroying our self-worth. This pattern may be repeating from something we witnessed in our childhood. One of our parents may have stayed in a toxic situation when they should have left or worse, moved into one toxic relationship after another.
Many of you will remain single and wonder what is wrong with you? What is wrong with your Karma that you can’t attract love and you will compare yourself to your friends who are married and may have children? And you wonder, why not me? But what you may not realize is that some of your friends may be trapped in very toxic situations and are not as happy as their picture-perfect social media feeds make them appear.
I am going to tell you’ve been protected from such a fate. Why? Because you are being kept clear from toxic situations so that you can take this precious time to heal, and clear much of the garbage that got you into a relationship that may have really hurt you and made you doubt your desirability and perhaps even your instincts about the person you were dating or living with.
The Universe decided that you needed this time to get recalibrated, to realize what you truly want and to get clear on your deal breakers. You are learning to create boundaries with yourself and others.
What Are Boundaries?
- In actionable terms, it is the equivalent as an adult of not allowing your parent to talk to you like a 6-year-old for starters.
- It means not allowing a person to make amorous or very disrespectful advances to you in terms of sending you an indecent photo via text or saying something that is way over the top.
- It’s not allowing your friends to determine how you have to act. Meaning, if you are going through a spiritual shift you may have friends who want the old you. But the old you is gone and yet they somehow still get mad at you for being the new, improved, more empowered you.
- It means you let go of those who cannot support you as you grow.
An Act of Self-Respect
So, here is the truth… There is a part of you that actually loves yourself too much to accept a garbage relationship. You aren’t stuck up, you are an amazing force that realizes that you deserve better--- guess what? The Universe will, in time, agree when you stop doubting yourself and when you truly see that staying single rather than saying yes to toxic crumbs is a great act of self-respect. Now all you need to realize is to love yourself for being single rather than beating yourself up for being a “loser” in love.
YOU are a winner! You have won over the act of being afraid to be alone because you love yourself that much. So now please honor that and get ready for that special someone to walk through that door. It’s a matter of time and the only person blocking that is your self-doubt.