Learn to Love Your Unlikeable Parts

Date 5/26/2018

Understanding you aren't perfect is a great step to loving your whole self.

Understanding you aren't perfect is a great step to loving your whole self.

Maybe you don't like the way your nose curves every-so-slightly to the left, or how it took you five years instead of four to earn your bachelor's degree. Perhaps you're forever trying to hide your body because you don't like its form. Whatever the case, we all have things we don't like about ourselves. Now it's time to figure out how to love them.

See the Good

You can find the good in just about any situation or scenario. Maybe you have a scar on your knee from a skiing accident. When you look at the scar, don't see the discolored skin. Think of the enjoyment you felt while sliding down the slopes. When you catch yourself thinking about your unlikeable parts, concentrate on the subject to find something good about it.

Turn Negatives Into Positives

Negative emotions hurt, but you don't have to wallow in them. Acknowledge your negative feelings, but start putting a positive spin on them. For instance, maybe you're a little judgmental. Instead of harping on that fact, think about ways in which you could practice acceptance and frame your opinions more tactfully. Look at this unlikeable part as something on which to improve.

Own Your Imperfections

Maybe you don't like a part of yourself, but that doesn't mean others feel the same way. In many cases, we're so cognizant of our imperfections that we believe they're as visible as a billboard at noon. However, the people we love don't always see those parts. Own your imperfections as part of who you are. You can change things when needed, but don't be afraid to admit your weaknesses.

Practice Positive Self-Talk

How you talk to yourself can directly impact how you feel about your unlikeable parts. For instance, do you ever stand in the mirror and think negative thoughts, such as "I'm so ugly" or "I wish I could drop 20 pounds?" When you catch yourself in these moments, immediately respond with positive self-talk. You might think "I like my body just the way it is" or "I'm comfortable with my self-image." Over time, positive self-talk becomes natural.

Put Yourself First

If you don't take care of yourself — mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally — you can't take care of anyone else. Focus on putting yourself first. It might feel selfish, but it's actually a selfless act because you're preparing yourself to be kind to others. Give yourself permission to indulge in some navel-gazing and to tend to your mental and physical health.

Seek an Outside Perspective

Self-loathing can become so ingrained in your psyche that you can't imagine another way to live. It's a heartbreaking situation to encounter, and you might need help to see you're not nearly as unlikeable as you thought. Call a psychic hotline or a tarot card reader for some guidance. A third party can help you see what you've been missing.

It might sound vain to love yourself, but it's actually an empowering process that allows you to put more good energy into the universe.


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