7 Bad Habits That Are Ruining Your Relationship

Published Date 8/10/2013
Under: Love, Relationships & Family



Are you guilty of some of these habits?

People think the main causes for divorce are the big things, such as cheating or gambling away life savings, or perhaps abuse. But just as many good relationships fall prey to ongoing, annoying bad habits as anything else. When you fail to address a bad habit, it betrays your partner's trust in you because he or she begins to believe that if you cared you wouldn't do it. These are the habits to break, and how.

1. Spying
A lack of trust when it's unwarranted is annoying. If you seriously can't trust your partner, you need to seek counseling or a psychic to address these issues.

However, going through his or her cell phone, email, Facebook, and mail isn't helping to foster a good relationship. Stop spying and depend on solid communications to tell you what you need to know.

2. Laziness
Nobody enjoys living with someone who won't pull his or her own weight. If you're normally helpful around the house, but stop temporarily due to illness, the birth of a baby, or family crisis, they're likely to understand.

But if you've become a perpetual bum, clean up your act so your partner knows you're still engaged in keeping things up.

3. Messiness
Slobs make life miserable for those living with them. If you've become messy with your personal hygiene or around the house, clean things up. Keeping yourself and your home tidy shows pride in what you're building together.

4. Criticism
Nagging rarely, if ever, gets us what we want. Are you continually picking at your mate or his family? Start focusing on the positive things you love about them. When you're building them up, it's impossible to tear them down with your words and actions.

5. Comparing
"Joe always brings Suzie flowers," or "Jill would never let Ben do what you make me do," comments do not make your partner want to be a better person. These comments just make them want to retaliate with, "Then go be with Joe or Jill."

Instead, focus on what you two have together, not what you think other people have. (Pssst, Joe probably leaves the toilet seat up, and Jill is likely high-maintenance. Their lives aren't perfect either.

6. Not Listening
Have you fallen into the habit of tuning the other person out while they're talking to you? This makes him or her feel insignificant and unimportant to you.

Make time to stop what you're doing and hear what they have to say. They'll appreciate you for it, and your reward will be a closer connection you two share.

7. Losing Your Cool
Do you blow up over every little thing? Do you sometimes start fights, even in public? Controlling your temper is crucial for an intimate relationship.

If there is real anger lurking, open up and work things out. If small things are setting you off, get a grip. Most things aren't important enough to spoil a good relationship over.

When you put in the effort to get your bad habits under control, you're telling your significant other how important he or she is to you and how much you value the relationship. Your return is their willingness to be the best they can be for you.

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